I’m ugly.
I’m broken and unfixable.
My life is what it is.
I’m too old. My best days are behind me.
I don’t have time.
I’m good, but not good enough. Someone always beats me out.
Once I learn more about it, I’ll step out.
I’ve got ideas, but no one will give me a chance.
If I let myself really care about someone, they’ll break my heart.
I’m going to fail, and everyone’s watching.
I’m stuck.
I’ll never have a family.
She’s going to cheat on me.
I can’t get out of this hole.
I know I shouldn’t, but I can’t stop. I have to.
I’ve lost the thing that made me special.
I don’t have enough ________.
I can’t.
If you’re like me, it hurts even to read that list. But did some of it feel familiar? It did to me.
I asked several people in my life to anonymously share the message that creeps into their head and privately taunts them. This is part of the list that has formed so far. Keep in mind, these are uncommon people. They’re leaders of their industries, the center of their circles, and some of the smartest and most effective people I know. They’re doers. They’re popular. Many of them wise, some of them famous.
And yet each of them has vicious, paralyzing lies swirling around in their heads. Lies that are eager to make them believe they’re not enough, that the obstacles in their way are too great for them to overcome. Lies that would surely derail them if they let them linger and didn’t deal with them swiftly.
And so it is with you and me.
Were you to quiet yourself and ask, “What is the lie I’m listening to?”, you’d be stunned at the list you could make. Maybe some of these thoughts would make it onto your list, or maybe yours would look completely different. Regardless, like everyone walking the face of the earth, there’s a battle raging in your heart and mind between the person you were meant to be – and a second rate, apathetic, lazy and scared, counterfeit version of yourself.
We win or lose this battle by what we choose to believe – truth or lies. It’s a simple, but life altering fact: If you’re beaten in your mind, you’re beaten before you even begin. Period. Every time.
Think about it. If you think your efforts are for nothing – that you don’t have enough time or potential, that this is all there is, that it’s too late for you – then why in the world would you waste even one minute trying? What kind of dummy would you have to be to make a change if you believed your fate was sealed? And so you stand still… which, ironically, actually does seal your fate.
As we think, so we are. So it’s worth truly considering –
- What is the lie you’re listening to?
- What has it cost you to believe it?
- What would be possible if you decided to change your mind?
- What’s stopping you?
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I’m absolutely struggling with some of this right now. In fact I was just telling my wife a few days ago “I have ideas, and passion and drive – if only they would just give me a chance.”
I’ve been trying to secure a position as a youth pastor for over a year now. I’ve had many interviews and second interviews…but in the end I’m always passed over for another candidate. It’s been hard to handle sometimes and I begin wondering what’s wrong with me that nobody wants to hire me.
Thanks for writing this Chance!
Just this morning on my facebook wall, I wrote about my love of quilting, and how even the smallest piece of ugly fabric has the power to be turned into something beautiful. Then it hit me, all the lies I have been told in my life, by those closest to me, don’t mean squat because in beauty , or imperfection, it is not their place to put me down, or shame mefor not believing, or doing what they think I should be doing even in adulthood .
It is not their place, or their choice to convince me I am not worthy of being remade in this life. It is God’s choice to change me, which He has chosen to do in my life, and just like that piece of insignificant fabric I have in my quilt scraps, God takes it ( and me ) and replaces it’s lowly state, by bringing healing, and restoration to my soul. But its my choice to hear His Truth in life, and that I pray I will be able to hear every day, even in the hard times..
My lie, that I didn’t even know I was hearing until someone pointed it out to me: I deserve to be constantly punished for all the mistakes I have made and every goal I didn’t live up to.
[...] Don’t Believe The Lies Posted on July 12, 2012 by Eric This post was directly inspired by my friend, Chance Scoggins. Read his blog post here. [...]
It’s been an on-going struggle for me to try to hear the voice of God and seeing myself as He sees me. I grew up in a home where both of my adoptive parents were alcoholics and my father sexually abused me. I married a man that professed to love me and my children and I fled after ten years of domestic violence because it came down to being killed or killing to survive. My adoptive parents are older now and need help, and my adoptive brother and sister are too busy to help but not busy enough to have our adoptive parents babysit or ask for financial help. So much of your list are the tapes that have been played for years…and I could add an additional volume or two!!
I think that’s why God says, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is true….think on these things. Focusing on that has helped more than anything to refute the lies that may reverberate in my mind.